Publishable? Hmmm... publishable... that's a toughie. I've got lots of material that's completely unpublishable on that very subject, but nothing that even remotely resembles anything suitable for human consumption.
"From the very genesis of implementation, the Bureau of Land Management's Geographic Coordinate's database began with a flawed premise, imprecise execution, mismanaged data acquisition, and the kind of rampant devil-may-care development that one usually witnesses among besotted French vintners/software developers during harvest season in Provence. As one traces the creation, procedures, rules and consistency of the BLM data structure, one realizes that rabid simians would have fared better in this quest, even if they had to somehow develop the database in the seminal format of flung feces. The fact that otherwise rational individuals have come to rely upon such a government created steaming heap of bukkake code, leads one to question one's own veracity. However, the preponderance of evidence (eg: the cadastral stating that all of Rhode Island is, in fact, located somewhere south of Tempe, AZ, the insistence that Missituckey is actually a state, the disappearance of Roswell, NM from all land survey records (Ok, so that may be intentional, rather than simply incompetence.) all point conclusively to the single unified theorem that offers any form of rational explanation: the BLM has developed a mind-control ray.
Well, you get the idea. You can see the rest of my treatise in the Area 51/black ops forums in Abovetopsecret.com and shadowresearch.com. It's right next to the section on Skyquakes, Brown Noise Generators and Disney's Cryogenic Head.
Gawd. I love my Brown Noise Generator. Once I devised proper insulation and rigged a power supply in my car. life has never been better.
(the above is fiction. Don't believe a word of it. It's fake. Phony. Useless drivel. Please don't hunt me down again. Is that the muffled drone of a silenced chopper I hear? Oh crap. Gotta run! Ta!)
