Damn, you beat me to posting this here. (NOW who's stealing content from the Vortex, huh??!!)
This could very well be the next Great American Novel. That dude can write!
A taste of what lies within...
The night I set my truck on fire:
The equipment that we were provided with really wasn't the best. The trucks were old and frequently broke down, the engine for the blower motor (the motor that provided suction ) didn't work correctly, and everything was worn out and smelled like garbage.
One fall evening, something went horribly wrong. Horribly, horribly wrong.
I was about halfway through my run at the local mall. Because it was fall, i had managed to suck up a metric assload of leaves into the truck's hopper. I was rolling along, jamming out to my iPod when I sensed a change in the blower motor. It sounded like some sort of shrieking, so I hopped out for a closer listen.
Yeah, it was shrieking all right, but I didn't see anything wrong. I started to walk back to the cab when all hell broke loose. The shrieking had turned into a high pitched screaming and smoke poured out of the top. Not good. I was trying to smack the kill switch when the engine caught fire.
I got back out of the cab and just . Finally, my mind got into gear and I made a reach for the fire extinguisher which was strapped just below the rear motor... right next to a 5 gallon jerry can of fuel for the leaf blowers. And then I said something that I ended up saying pretty much every night with that job.
"Oh. Hell no."
The entire rear end of the truck was engulfed in flames. I calmly reached for my phone and speed dialed the number of a cop I had befriended a few weeks prior.
This is Bryce.
Hey, it's Bruiser. You got a sec?
Yeah dude, what's up?
Well, I'm at the mall and the entire rear end of my truck is on fire.
You hurt or anything?
Nope.
Awesome, I'll be there in a sec!
I sat down on a concrete island away from the truck, lit a cigarette (I didn't smoke before I took this job) and just waited for Bryce.
I didn't have to wait long, because halfway through my cigarette, Bryce and two other squad cars roll up. We all end up standing there for about a minute, just watching the entire rear end of this truck go up in flames. Bryce finally calls it in and we all just stand there watching.
Well, remember how I mentioned sucking up the leaves? Yeah, somehow an ember got into the hopper and set everything off. Heat and pressure built up in the metal hopper and started bowing out the sides, making a sickening metal popping noise. Finally figuring things out, I just looked at Bryce and said, "Watch this."
As if on cue, WHUMP! The rear door of the hopper blows open and skitters across the parking lot. Thick tongues of flame lick out of the back. Leaves and flaming garbage are all around the truck in the most disgusting thing I've ever smelled.
Bryce looks over at me and just says
R I G H T E O U S !
Well, the fire department shows up, douses the flames, and somewhere in all of that I radioed Sweeper HQ. A tow truck came with a spare truck for me, and hauled the hulk of my old truck away.
I kind of went through the motions for the rest of the night and fully expected to be fired, or at least reprimanded.
Nope. My boss asked if I was all right and told me:
These things happen all the time!
Bryce made me promise to call him every time something like that happened.
Edit: I asked for pictures of the truck for my blog, but the Boss said no. Being that I had a cheapie cell phone, I didn't have a camera there either. I'm sure the pics are attached to some insurance person's cubicle somewhere.
Edit 2: righteous. It's late and I forgot how to spell
There are about 30 stories just as good as this one on there.
